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 Post subject: My far off place
PostPosted: 12/02/08 11:46:07 PM 
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Joined: 08/28/08 09:13:31 AM
Posts: 289
Location: Fayettevegas, TN
Walking against the wind on a busy street
People pushing and shoving their ways along
Each on their own thought pattern
Each as far away from this world
As their minds can possibly take them
Their faces blank and unfriendly
Not so much because they’re unfriendly
But because they really aren’t thinking about smiling
Just going on about their day
This day
This day was grey like slate rock
Everyone dressed for the rain to come
But it didn’t come
Not yet
The buildings clear solid forms
Blend in with the sky
As my eyes followed their ascent
Cars rushed by
Coughing an sputtering clouds of exhaust
Thumping and shaking the ground with
Amplified sound within
But the day went on
The people kept walking
With blank faces
Minds shut off to the sound of the city
I to find sound blocked on occasion
Selective hearing my mother calls it
Today I focused on my steps
I heard my shoes scoff the uneven pavement
With a surreal loudness,
As if everyone could hear it
I looked down for just a few strides
Any longer I would run into some one
Throwing them from their far off place
And me from mine
There was nothing so spectacular
About the sidewalk anyway
All that was there were patches of
Discoloration from chewing gum
Vomit and piss no doubt
Trash, change dropped or lost from
A hole in some ones pocket
I walked on looking ahead
Faces blending in with one another
Nothing much to catch ones eye
Just the same blank faces,
Its seems as though
I’m running on a loop,
Then there’s a man
Nothing fabulous or unordinary
About him
But he stuck out
Because with an intenseness
So abrasive it scratched through
My far away place
Like sand paper,
And I was aware.
The city noise pounding in my head
People’s shoes clicking,
He looked into me
And me into him
And I felt my head move as
I followed him passing by
Then he was lost
Lost in the ebb and flow
Of the crowd
And I felt myself stopping to look
People bumped into me
And pushed me every which way
As I fought to follow him
But he was gone
And I still standing watched
As people fell back into place
And walked around me
I was just another street lamp
Or mail box
Everything broke then
The clouds ripped
Heavy droplets of rain
Plopping on peoples heads
I look up
Many times I had seen rain falling
From straight on
But I had never really watched it falling
and seeing it splash on my face
In supper slow-mo
So again I’m walking
This day by a store
And in the window
I saw him
And I felt the weight of his gaze
Through the rain glazed window
But I kept walking
Slipping back into my far away place
Where I only heard my wet feet sloshing
In my shoes
And saw only fading sky scrappers
Wet people, liquid flow
Just a face in the crowd
my own world better than
this,
will i ever wake up

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 Post subject: Re: My far off place
PostPosted: 12/03/08 12:43:54 AM 
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Joined: 11/21/07 10:57:36 PM
Posts: 1289
you should have gone in the store...

epic one ..
real descriptive.. narrative of a 7th temple walk through the matrix...

word..

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 Post subject: Re: My far off place
PostPosted: 12/04/08 06:56:49 PM 
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Joined: 04/18/01 05:00:00 PM
Posts: 253
Location: 49 degrees north 123 degrees west
"This day was grey like slate rock
Everyone dressed for the rain to come "

i live in a really rainy climate, and i love this image.

this whole piece was beautiful exposition of a few moments that would otherwise go by uncelebrated, if not for the magic of prosetry, or whatever it is we do here.
thanks for posting this.

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 Post subject: Re: My far off place
PostPosted: 12/05/08 12:52:41 PM 
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Joined: 08/28/08 09:13:31 AM
Posts: 289
Location: Fayettevegas, TN
I'm glad you like it, it's a very old piece of mine but a favorite...i thought i would share sense everyone here actually reads and comments on posts now...plus i really miss the city i've been in the boonies to long.

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